I spent a large chunk of today waiting for the car dealership to call me back about the part(s?) I needed ordered for my car. After, of course, spending a good chunk of time on hold waiting to leave the message which was supposed to prompt them to call me back. And of course there was the twenty minutes I spent on hold on Saturday when I called my insurance company for roadside assistance.
But, you know, the more I think about it, the more I feel like that’s what my life is right now: on hold.
I’m always waiting for someone else to do something I can react to.
Sometimes it’s something simple that’s not really about me, like waiting for the bank to open so I can deposit a check. (Yes, I know there’s online ways to do that, and I was going to download the app for my iPad, but then I saw the reviews on that app, which all labelled it as pretty much unusable. I decided it was better to wait for the bank to open, instead.)
Other times it’s more personal, and more constricting. Like that phone call I spent hours waiting for, the phone call that never came. Or like this week’s homework.
It’s a group project this week, so I can’t really do anything until the other members of the team respond to the post I put on the discussion board. So far, only the professor has responded, to answer my question about the precise timing of the due date. The other students haven’t replied yet.
It’s Monday night. The project is due Thursday, at 5:30 p.m.
Now, I don’t know how other people do things. I readily admit this. But personally? For a paper that’s due on Thursday, I like to have the rough draft at least mostly done, if not fully completed, by Monday night, so there’s plenty of time to revise. (This is not, of course, to say that I’ve always accomplished this feat. Just that it’s my preferred situation.)
That means that I’m feeling a little worried by the fact that I haven’t heard from my teammates on this project.
Maybe that just means that I’m weird to want to get it done so early. Maybe everyone else works closer to the deadline. My teammates are probably doing better in this class than I am, so I’m sure I have no room to complain. I’m just getting antsy and feel like my hands are tied, a sensation I decidedly dislike.
Maybe that’s just what life is like in our civilization, and I’ve just never stopped to think about it before.
Or maybe that’s just the human condition. The farmers in any civilization–modern or ancient–have to wait on the seasons and the growing cycles of the plants they farm. Parents have to wait for their children to be born and then to grow up before they can entrust them with the future. Et cetera.
However, I am most definitely tired of always being on hold. I just don’t see any alternatives right now.
(If only I had a TARDIS…!)