There’s this type of person out there who apparently cannot function unless they’re talking on a cell phone.
Driving their cars, waiting in line in a store, going to the restroom, walking down the street, no matter what they’re doing, they’re yammering away into their cell phone.
I always know when my mail’s about to be delivered, because I can hear the mail carrier coming, because of the loud cell phone conversation.
When I was trying to return some cat food that I got overcharged for, the woman in front of me in line was having an involved conversation on her phone while her return was being processed.
As I was leaving the store, the woman putting stuff in the back of her SUV (sparkling clean, and therefore almost certainly not needed) was talking away on her cell phone, despite that she had someone else in the car with her!
Those are the ones that I really don’t get. They’re sitting there in a car with someone, or walking down the street (or through a store) with someone, but instead of talking to the living, breathing person beside them, they’re talking to their phone instead. Now, yes, I know there is presumably a living, breathing person on the other end of the phone call (unless they’ve reached Miku), but that doesn’t make it any less rude to the person they’re actually with.
When I see these people who can’t start their car without starting a phone call first, I wonder what kind of life they lead.
I mean, do they routinely say things like “Hold on, I have to brush my teeth”? Or do they kiss their phones goodnight?
I’d say they have a better relationship with their phones than some people ever have with their spouses, but these are probably the same people who are always lining up at the Apple store to get the newest version of the iPhone. (Or at whatever other store to get the latest Android phone. Same mentality; different operating system.)
I seriously doubt they have anything they need to say that’s so urgent that they have to discuss it all the time. I’m sure it could wait until they get home.
The last time I heard someone on the phone in the ladies’ room (admittedly, this was about four or five years ago) the conversation she was having the entire time she was in there didn’t sound like it was of any importance. Barely above gossip level, in fact. So why did she feel the need to be shouting it down her cell phone while on the toilet?
Bigger question.
How did these people live before there were cell phones? Some of them, yes, are so young that it may not really be an issue. But I’ve seen women older than I am who seem to have their phones superglued to their hands. So what did they do before there were cell phones?
Did they have to (gasp!) pay attention to what was in front of them?
Did they (horror of horrors!) have to talk to the people around them?
Did they (say it ain’t so!) have to acknowledge that the rest of the world exists?
And here’s the kicker!
What would these people do if cell phone service went out?
Cell phones–to my limited understanding of them–function via satellites. So what if the satellites go down? What if some meteor shower (or what have you) takes out the cell phone satellites?
Normal people should still be able to function just fine. But these people who need to talk on their cell phones all the time, what about them? Are they going to start dying of “cell phone withdrawal”?
I’m not sure if it’s more pathetic or galling.
What I am sure of is that every time I see one of them doing a terrible job of driving because they’re so busy talking on their cell phone, I want to use telekinesis to make their phone implode. (Sadly, I don’t have telekinesis…)
We're All Mad Here! 